Turning down the noise

I was perusing the forums at Bhuz* and I came across an incredibly helpful reading recommendation from Ozma. A student dancer was explaining how her old teacher had helped her to get out of her own head (my words) regarding dancing. In response, Ozma recmmended the book How to Dance Forever, and in particular the section on "Noise". Noise is all the self criticism, worry and defeatist thoughts that happen while learning dance, which can become patterns that can inhibit dancing.

If you log onto Amazon and go to the book, check the "Look Inside" option and search for noise inside the book, and you can read most of the chapter (thank you to Suzana for pointing this out). It definitely struck a chord with me, as noise is something I have had to work past in dancing. It's the "I'm so old/out of shape/uncoordinated/clueless/etc." critic that can run on an endless loop in my head. When this happens I have to turn it off, focus only on what I need to do in class, ask questions, and act like I look awesome while I work things out (to avoid frowning, angry looks, or "oops" face while dancing).

While reading one line struck me as particularly relevant for ATS/ITS dancers: "Above all, be certain you learn as quickly as possible what happens on count 1. If you don't know count 1, count 2 will be ridiculous." ATS/ITS dancers, have you ever had the moment when you've gone into a move you don't know that well, fumbled the one count, then proceeded to make a train wreck of the next 4 or more counts? I have! I've also hesitated started a move, with the same result, as well as confusing feet, losing the beat, rushing a move to get to the "good part" and so on.

When this happens you can not only mess up yourself, but as a leader you can take your followers down with you. If that happens too many times, you can start to lose the trust of those following you, and when that trust is gone you can lose the magic that makes ATS/ITS work. You don't lead with confidence, your followers second guess what you are doing, and there becomes a tension and stilted quality to the dancing that makes it flat and uninspiring.

So, know your moves! Know them well, inside and out, facing in different directions. Know them to different tempos, how to come in and out of them from different moves, and which ones work and don't work with different music. Know what to do when you mess up, so you can correct gracefully and with confidence. Have your safety moves. Also, know your music! How many times have you fumbled your dancing because you didn't know the music? If you're dancing to live music or a song you've never used or heard before, mess ups will happen. If you're dancing to music you've used before or was picked for a performance, there is no reason to get out there and have no idea of what is happening. Listen to your music in practice, at home, in the car, wherever and whenever you can. Knowing your music is as much a part of training as knowing your dance vocabulary.

And no, no one is perfect and there is nothing wrong with messing up, but messing up and letting the noise take over your head can lead to a disintegration of quality for the whole troupe. Be prepared both physically and mentally so that you can dance with confidence and ease (and joy!), which is the best thing for you and your troupe!


* really, no matter what you're bellydance style, get on Bhuz occasionally and read the forums. There is a lot of information to glean from the members.

Defeat the Beast

So, the 365 Days of Practice are going well. I need to update February, and I did miss one day in March so far. I'm pretty proud that my reaction was, "Whatever, I'll deal and get back on it tomorrow." That's a great reaction for me, because I like to stick with things I start and tend to be really hard on myself when I "fail", which is a pointless reaction because it's not failing if I miss a day and it's not the end of the world. Perhaps I had a better reaction because I knew I'd be getting back on the horse the next day. Perhaps it's because I missed practice because I had a fabulous time having a long dinner and evening of conversation with an old friend, which was way more important than that day's practice.

On the other hand, I think the regular practice is making me have a change in attitude about my physical body. I think I am having some sort of split between my body and brain, but in a necessary way. The other day I was thinking about my natural tendency to be lazy, to want to sit around and do nothing, to indulge my food whims. Then I thought about how good I felt at TribalCon, dancing and working and being on my feet (and sometimes other body parts) for hours, eating for pleasure and because I needed it. Sore but not totally wiped out, ready to start again the next day, ready to dance for fun at night.

I thought about how different are our modern needs nutritionally, physically and mentally compared to how our bodies have evolved to survive. Then this short phrase popped into my mind: my body wants to eat, spawn* and die. It wants to do what it has to to keep moving, pass on my genetic material as long and as much as it can, and that's about it. My body is capable of a lot physically, but it wants to do the minimum to get the work done.

The outcome of this thought process was this: I need to be a lot harder on my body. I'm not saying to hate myself or hurt myself or punish myself. I need to tell my body to suck it up, that we're dealing with modern times and my modern brain and it isn't going to get what it wants. My brain needs to have some control or my body is going to go to hell. The result of indulging all the laziness and sloth is pain, atrophy, ill health and frustration. Sure, I want to nurture my body, pamper it and treat it well, but nurturing cannot slide into excuses. Nurturing is an "also", not an "instead of." I need to get my brain more on board, too. I know what I should do, I know how I should eat and how much exercise I need and my brain needs to drop the excuses and learn to love the work. When I'm active and pushing myself and learning my brain feels better too.

So, things I am working on:

* Cooking healthier foods and acknowledging that enjoyment of food is necessary but that it is also fuel, and not every meal needs to be a huge production or an indulgent treat. When food is special, make it special so that the whole experience is set apart. Also, eat more raw veggies.

* Making sure my practice sessions are at least 30 minutes

* Getting up earlier so I can practice in the morning so I know it is taken care of for the day. Also, that way I can practice again later if I want, or do other physical things: gardening, walking, classes. This is the tough one, especially the days I work late. It's going to be gradual, so it might not happen soon but I'm working on it.

* Deepening my practices by approaching them on many levels. Not just doing the moves, but focusing on breathing, expression, tension, emotion, intention, control, speed, etc.

* Make downtime special. Don't have downtime because I get sucked into messing around online for hours. Acknowledge when it is happening so that it feels intentional and valid, not "wasted" time. It's okay to spend an afternoon sitting on the couch reading or blogging or whatever, but make it happen, not let it happen. And don't forget to make sure it happens, or else I'll burn out.


* I don't address any of the "spawning" things here because I'm childfree. Yep, sometimes my body says "Gogogo!" and my brains says, "Are you sure you're not making a mistake?", but it's not in the cards for me. The only thing I regret about my decision is for my parents sake, but at least my brother has kids.

Tribal Con, the quick report

Tribal Con has taught me not only new ways of thinking about and executing belly dance, it has also told me the importance of supporting the local economy by eating my way through the neighborhood around the hotel and trying many new, delicious beers that are available in said neighborhood. Hey, I was working hard this weekend!

2 (video) reviews

I have been exercising my Netlix account late (or, if you're my SO, hogging the Netflix) and picked up two videos for getting my butt in gear: Every Shimmy in the Book with Bozenka and Jillian Michaels - 30 Day Shred. I figured someone else might find my thoughts on the videos to be helpful, so here are my reviews.

A quick note to start. I feel that neither of these videos are good for total movement beginners. It's good to have a basic knowledge of proper posture, how to keep your back flat when bending over in movements, how to keep your core engaged, all things you learn in a basic dance or fitness class. Jillian does give some pointers in her video, reminding you not to bend your knee over or toes, not to collapse your ankles and other simple instructions. Bozenka does not really get into any pointers on form, so it's good to have at least a basic idea of safe posture and movement for belly dance.

Now, I really wanted to like the Bozenka DVD. I've only seen videos of her online but I really like her dancing and yes, her shimmies are wonderful. Unfortunately this video does not do her justice, not her dancing and, I'm assuming, not her teaching. It's labeled as every shimmy in the book but it only touches on a small handful of shimmies possible. What's worse, though, is that she doesn't really explain any of the shimmies. She demos a shimmy, sort of breaks it down, does it slow, speeds up very quickly and then there is a bit of practice time but not a whole lot. There are no detailed break downs, no tips. There is no practice section where you go from one shimmy to the next. There is not much in the way of discussing the way the shimmies happen, anatomically. Each shimmy is presented in the same manner and the whole thing feels very dry. There is also a drum solo performance with her and Issam, and though it's lovely I wish BDSS had sprung for a little extra production budget because the camera angle in part of the performance shows the lights and back stage area and really? Do a couple of takes! Actually, the whole DVD felt like the production was rushed and on a tight budget, which made me realize that the one other BDSS instructional video I own, Rachel Brice's first, was very well made. Summary: I wanted to like this, and if you can check it out for free I would do so, but I wouldn't spend any money on it. The top review at the Amazon page pretty much says it all for me.

Next, the video I didn't want to like. Why? I hate exercising. I do enjoy being active and getting exercise through my hobbies or daily activities, but I do not like focused work out time. Unfortunately I have a desk job, so I need focused work out time. I ditched my gym membership when I lost my job last year, not that I ever used it enough because going to the gym to spend 40 minutes on the elliptical staring at a wall while I went no where was not my thing. What do I like? Hiking. And dance class.

Anyway, I know I need to add more activity to my life and I know I need to do it in small steps so I don't get frustrated and give up. At about the time I admitted this fact I read this helpful post at the blog Not Martha. As a side note, I almost want to get back on the elliptical if that means I get to Netflix Gilmore Girls. Taking the post to heart I rented the 30 Day Shred video and, hey! I kind of like it! I admit, I've never watched The Biggest Loser so I have no idea how Jillian acts on that show. On the video she's encouraging but also no nonsense. If you want to get somewhere while working out you need to apply yourself, and she says that straight up. I liked her attitude, the quick pace of the workout, that there are modifications for some of the moves, and that there's a progression to the video. At about the moment where I'm thinking, "Bored bored BORED!" it's over.

Now, I'm still on Level 1 as I'm not a consistent exerciser, but here are some things I've read and that I do to change up what's on the video. I warm up a little before I start, by jogging in place, or else my calves are not ready for the jump rope moves. I do not pause in the warm up but keep moving during her explanations. There is a lunge/squat move with curls that I rarely do because of my knees; instead I do the curls with squats. I don't do the jumping jacks, I know my form is awful and I don't want to hurt myself, so I jog during that section. I pull my punches a bit so I don't overextend my shoulders. I take 3-4 times as long to stretch out at the end, targeting trouble spots on my body that I need to address. When I move up I'll follow the advice of a review I read where the reviewer goes up through the levels, then on the next round ups the dumbbell weight to get a better work out. I think as I progress I may pick to sub in some moves in places as I find what I like.

Now do I think this video alone will make me look like Jillian? Hell no! But I know that some activity is better than no activity so I feel it's a really good starting place for me. This video is totally worth the money and I plan on buying it soon so I can send my Netflix version back for some other budding athlete to check out.